Dear Diary, Why Did I Spend Two Days Avoiding a Half-Hour of Work?

Issue 15: The dentist, the gas bill & the dishwasher

Photo by Kate Laine on Unsplash

Happy Monday!

My Monday would have been a lot better if I hadn’t spent the weekend reminding myself of the 3 tasks I had to do today.

1. Call the dentist.

2. Call my energy provider about a bill they overcharged me for.

3. Clean the dishwasher (I’ve been washing the dishes by hand, just to avoid cleaning it).

That was it. No complicated projects.

And yet, I spent the entire weekend dreading them, making a mental note that I had to do them on Monday.

To be fair, the phone calls did require waiting until today, as phone lines are not open on the weekend. But cleaning the dishwasher? That could’ve happened at any point. Saturday afternoon? Sunday morning? Sure. But something in my brain filed it under “Monday Energy.”

Let me explain to you how my neurodivergent mind works…

Lists belong together like a little family. And you never split up a family. Lists stick together in my head, therefore, I should cross them off together, consecutively one after another, on the same day. And more importantly (and this part is crucial) I wasn’t going to waste my precious, hard-earned weekend cleaning a dishwasher.

So instead of doing the tasks, I did what I do best: I worried about them. Quietly. All weekend long. The kind of low-level dread in the background whilst I’m watching TV or pretending to relax.

Can we talk about how exhausting procrastination can be? Not physically, but emotionally. Mentally. The tasks themselves are rarely the problem. It’s the way we carry the burden and the worry. The way they expand in our minds, take on extra weight, and morph into something more intimidating than they are.

And the worst part? The dread doesn’t make the task go away. It just makes you feel worse while it waits.

So this morning arrived. Monday, the long-awaited scene of the action.

And what did I do?

I procrastinated again. I told myself I’d make the calls after breakfast. Then, I would do it after I dropped the kids off at school. Then, I needed a break because I had just dropped the kids off, and then of course, after that I had to go on Substack.

Finally, sometime in the late afternoon, perhaps out of guilt, perhaps out of frustration, I sat down, made the two phone calls, and then scrubbed the dishwasher.

Total time taken: 30 minutes.

That’s it.
Half an hour of doing.
Two full days of dreading.

It’s almost comical but also kind of sad.

The truth is, procrastination doesn’t just steal your time; it steals your peace. It drains your energy before you’ve even started.

So here I am now:

• Dishwasher sparkling.

• Bill corrected.

• Dentist appointment booked.

And I’m left wondering: how many moments have I lost, waiting for the “perfect time” to just get something over and done with?

Maybe next time I’ll remember this feeling, or maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll put it off again.

But at least I wrote it down. Just in case.